When 3 becomes 2...

You are my longest relationship in this life. The only ones who have been here since my very first breath, and the ones I know will remain until my very last.

That’s why you are my hardest goodbye. Because when I leave, it feels like I’m leaving a piece of myself behind.

I try to be strong for you, I always have. Even as the baby, the one who was supposed to be “taken care of,” I learned quickly that I didn’t get to need anything. I figured it out by watching, by copying, by surviving in the spaces where help never came. And maybe that’s why I’ve always hidden the most fragile parts of myself from you. You see my tears, but not the ones that really sting. You see my struggles, but not the ones that nearly broke me.

Leaving wasn’t easy. Every mile I’ve traveled away from home has tugged at me like an invisible thread stitched to my chest — pulled tighter with each step toward the airport, pulled harder with each memory of us.

I think about our random beach drives, windows down, music blasting, as if salt water and laughter could fix anything. I think about those late-night ICEE runs when we had no reason to go, other than the fact that we just wanted to be together. And I think about the sleepovers at Granny’s house, when we crammed onto the floor or the couch, watching spooky movies until we fell asleep, never knowing how fleeting those nights would be.

Those are the moments that shaped me. The kind of memories that don’t fade, even when distance tries to dull them. They are stitched into my bones — the reason my heart aches every time I leave.

But I left because I wanted to give us more. I wanted to believe life could be bigger than survival. That I could learn, grow, and break the weight of what’s been handed down to us. That one day, I could come back not just older, but stronger — able to hold us all up when the world feels too heavy.

A Letter to My Siblings

Dear Siblings,

You are my first best friends, my first safe place, and the truest definition of “home.”

I know I don’t always say it, but you are the reason I keep going when everything feels too heavy. You are the reason I push myself even when I’m exhausted. And you are the reason I believe in better days.

I may pretend I’m fine so you won’t worry, but here is the truth: I miss you with an ache that never goes away. It doesn’t matter how many miles or years pass — I carry you in my chest, in every decision, in every dream.

Wherever I go, whatever I do, you are the anchor I will always come back to. I love you beyond words, beyond distance, beyond time.

Love always,

With ʻUhane From Me to You,

ʻUhane Hawaiʻi